The Best Bars In Mumbai To Wait Out The Apocalypse

If you’ve been watching the news because you’re a 60 year old man, you’ll probably be aware that we’re on the brink of an all out nuclear war with our neighbour to the North, Pakistan. But this post isn’t about politics, or reason; this is a giant media company so it’s about pointless speculation into the hypothetical but not impossible scenario of the apocalypse; and the best places in Bombay to sit it out. Preferably with some beer, a few friends you wouldn’t mind eating when you run out of Maggi, and some kickass music.

As someone who occasionally plays Fallout 4 on expert mode, I think I’m qualified to comment on the intricacies of post apocalyptic survivalism. There is one condition when it comes to picking out a place to chill through the end of civilisation; it has to be fun.  Any loser can survive doomsday, but it takes a Bombay Report reader to make the best of an awful situation. Considering that the end of days is upon us I’ll cut short my childish yapping.

1) Anti Social, near Khar Station, Khar West

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While Social isn’t nearly as nice as it used to be back in June, maybe because of an expansion policy they stole from Genghis Khan, Anti Social is still as awesome as ever. Plus I don’t think bad service should be your biggest concern when there are mutant zombies roaming the streets. Besides, Anti Social in Khar is one of the few places in the city that’s underground fo real; ideal for surviving the initial nuclear explosion. They usually have cool performances lined up too; odds are you’ll be roommates with the guys from Mumbai’s Finest.

2) The Local, opposite Mumbai University, Fort

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As someone who has a love hate relationship with basic directions, The Local has always eluded me. But from what I hear from people who’ve actually been there, it’s an amazing place. It has every day karaoke nights, and since it’ll be the apocalypse, you can brutally murder the idiots who sing Wonderwall without any legal repercussions. The Local can only be accessed if you have their secret password, so you don’t have to worry about radioactive zombies storming the venue; unless you give them the password obviously, which would be ill advisable.

3) Rainforest Resto Bar, Phoenix Market City, Kurla

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Kurla has been a terrifying place full of rotting car chassis long before the apocalypse. And hidden in the innards of Phoenix Market City is an oasis of life, a Garden of Eden in the heart of Hell. They call it Rainforest Resto Bar, and it’s either a rainforest themed restaurant or a restaurant themed rainforest I honestly can’t tell because Kurla’s a bit weird. One of the first rules of surviving the apocalypse is to leave the city and head for the woods. Since Mumbai doesn’t have any woods apart from Borivali National Park, which is awfully far, Rainforest Resto Bar will have to do. I don’t know if this will affect your decision, but it has a really cool waterfall.

If you happen to know any places worth adding to the list do let us know, and maybe we’ll let you tag along. We’ll be the guys wearing headlamps.

Disclaimer: All of these restaurants do play EDM from time to time, so really escaping from mindless zombies isn’t as easy at this article would have you believe.

 

Images – Zomato

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